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Sunday, September 5, 2010

He sees us.

Today at the beginning of our sermon at church our pastor told this story and it got to me, like deep in my core. There were tears rolling down my face. Does that ever happen to anyone else? It's slightly embarrassing, but sometimes God's just talking right to your heart and it's emotional.

Our pastor said he was watching the movie The Joy Luck Club with his wife in the movie theater. I've never seen it, but the movie is about (I think) three Chinese women who move to the U.S. and have three daughters and the clash between their two generations. In this really poignant scene, one of the daughters is expressing that she feels like her mom doesn't see her and the things she goes through and the mother wraps her hands around her face and looks in her eyes and says, "I see you. I see you." And our pastor said when he saw that he started weeping and put his head in his wife's lap because he felt like for the first time, he really saw his wife, her heart, her character, everything wonderful and God given about her.

And I lost it. I think because I want to be seen. I think because I want to know that God sees me and I think I lost it right there in the middle of church because He was telling me that when I feel unseen by everyone else around me and when I feel alone in whatever my daily struggle or stress is, He sees me. He sees us. He sees our hearts and our fears and our good intentions and our good, God given qualities and that we're doing the best we can to live out the life He gave us to live. And He loves us.

And then tonight I saw this. I know that everything in the world is not orchestrated around me, but sometimes God uses other things our there to minister to us, and this definitely did.

Psalm 33:18 “But the eyes of the Lord are on those who fear Him, on those whose hope is in His unfailing love.”



2 comments:

  1. DO you keep a prayer journal? I find it to be more than cathartic. I feel like I'm talking to God and He's actually reading what I am saying. Like a diary. The words turning physical make them so real to me, and then I know they are real to God. For me to write it down makes it permanent. I feel like someone is listening then.

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  2. Yeah I do. Sometimes I write and sometimes I don't. It depends on what helps me pray most effectively that day. Sometimes I'm going too fast for my hand to write it down and it gets in the way, but sometimes I really need the writing to keep me focused. I have been using the one you gave me most recently, so thank you! :)

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